Business letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

Don't worry, I constantly forget that you constantly forget to deliver my presents. This is why I keep on writing you letters (also to track the number of times I've been bullied, but this is just in my head, I'm not saying it out loud); only that this time, it crossed my mind that maybe you don't find my letters appropriate. Was I too familiar? Too...not mature? So...unprofessional? Ok then granp...I mean, indeed Mr. Claus ,following is a draft list of our wishes with the relevant technical specifications:

-  peace of mind; not as in I don't give a f*** anymore, but as in I love the world-the world loves me.

- guts; not as in I bet I can hit my head on the wall, but as in I can and will eat this world alive.

- health; not as in restart PC, but as in reinstall Windows (note the reference to the software, not to the hardware!).

- patience; not as in, I waited, I got it, now shove it back in your a** but as in I waited, I got it, and I didn't get to hate it while waiting so d*** long for it (see all the previous times when items were overdue)

- open-mindedness; just because is never too much and to demonstrate that yes, you can appreciate it while you have it, and yes, you can be aware that this is a gift not all the people were blessed with.

- energy; not as in am too busy for you stepper, but as in I can step so fast on you stepper that you'll transform in a treadmill.

- love; small, huge, shy, insolent, rational, mystical, risky, mushy, early, late, dripping, pouring, explosive, implosive, bored, playful, mature, childish, daily, nightly, hidden, all over, giggling, mad-driving, lazy, pushy, sweet, bitter, respectful, reckless the description being comprehensive but not exhaustive.

(in other words: just give me my good doctor; he knows just what to do) 

Do not hesitate to contact us should you need further details. We are open to discussion and we take this opportunity to thank you for your support.

Looking forward to your answer,

O. Carina

Ro-Mania Project Manager

I've been good. Ravishing good. So irresistibly good.